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  • Carla Collis Gesite

Eliminate this Phrase from Your Vocabulary Today!

Don't you hate it when you realize your Mom was right when she gave you advice all those years ago?

Growing up, my Mom would often say to my sister and me, "Watch what you say. Words have power." I'd roll my eyes and continue doing exactly as I had before.

The older I get, the more I realize the wisdom in her advice. Lately, I realize how often I use language that subtly infuses negativity into my day.

The biggest culprit?

"I HAVE TO [fill-in-the-blank.]"

It's amazing how often I use this phrase. And I'm not talking about using it in a negative way, grumbling that I "HAVE TO." I mean, when someone asks what are you up to today? And I reply, for example, "I have to take my dog for a walk."

So, what's wrong with that, you ask?

Well, for starters, it implies I have no choice, which is not only untrue, but also feels disempowering.

Secondly, the words "have to" bring a feeling of obligation, like I need to do this thing, it's expected of me.

Thirdly, it takes the fun out of things.

What if, instead, I said, "I GET to walk the dog"?

Or "I choose to" or "I'm going to..."?

Think of something you're planning to do today. Now say it out loud: "I have to __________."

How did that feel? Did you find yourself feeling negative?

Maybe even tensing up?

Let's try it again. This time, say "I'm going to _______________."

Did that feel better?

If so, join me in this challenge to delete the phrase "have to" from your vocabulary!


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